Generally speaking, Cannabis has never really been considered the go-to "drug" when you are trying to boost your productivity and it is most certainly not a good idea if you are say an airline pilot, brain surgeon or crane operator, however I HIGHly doubt that anyone reading this is any of those things. For the rest of us there are actually a gigantic list of jobs where smoking weed could be considered a performance enhancing substance that might even give you an unfair advantage. Here are a few to get you thinking...
The HIGHlights: While this may not be the highest paying job nor the most interesting, for the right person, this could be HEAVEN. You get to attend every match of the season for free, get to operate heavy machinery and have longer breaks than your actual time working. Seems perfect for a stoner!
The down-side: It may be highly illegal "technically". But to that we say c'mon, the thing is so damn slow, on the ice when no-one else is AND it's surrounded by a stoner-proof ring!
"Damn near everyone with a creative job smokes a massive amount of weed. That’s because marijuana opens up your creative mind in ways that sober thinking never can. Suddenly, your jokes are funnier, your prose more engaging, your photos framed better and your paintings more colorful, rich and deep." - Co-Ed
2. Sunglasses ALL DAY!
3. Grow mo-betta weed!
This is a job that sucks you in the higher you get. The higher you get the better your product. So if you are not smoking while editing your shit is probably weak as.
ATT CUSTOMER SERVICE:
Firstly the job requirements are simple, and if you subscribe to any of their services you probably already know the scripted lines by heart.."Let me get my supervisor", "I am the supervisor", "I'm sorry, it's policy" etc.
Secondly the only way to get through a day of this repetitive shit is to be really high! It also helps when you have an irate customer on the other end. Try as they might, they are not getting a stoner worked up.
COUNTRY CLUB GOLF PRO:
If you peaked in college when you were on the Cal team, then you don't give a crap what anybody thinks about you anyways. This way you get to use all those Caddy Shack lines you spent so much time memorizing.
This job was made for stoners. Every note sounds sweeter while high. Just be mindful of the fact that not everybody is going to find the cowbell as mellifluous as you might.
There is something in weed called fuckit. And to be a mascot you need ample amounts of it! The only problem is that cottonmouth can kick in and if you are removing your moosehead every twenty seconds it's going break the kids' little hearts.
Creativity is spurred on by weed, we know this, but what many forget is that cooking is a very creative process. As creative as any other some might argue. If you can find a way to remember to turn off the gas after cooking then you are golden.
VIDEO GAME TESTER:
"On the list of awesome things to do while stoned, right next to listening to music, is playing video games. So mashing buttons for a living and smoking weed go hand-in-hand. Plus, since most of the people playing the game you’re testing are going to play it with a joint in their mouths, it’s really the only responsible course of action." Co- Ed
Being a stoner top ten list, there are obviously eleven items. Numer 11 being the most appropriate form of self-employment for a stoner. To know your product you have to smoke your product. So becoming an expert is easy.